Hate Meditation? Here’s 10 more ways to break the stress cycle.

I know! It’s been drummed into us over the past decade or so that if only we can master meditation, then we will be ‘in’ on the secret ability that will allow us to reach the status of the elite wellness gurus.

It’s positioned as the “be all, end all” for the health of your entire mind-body-spirit. It’s the absolute must-do that is the only path to beating the infamous health-buster called “stress.”

Don't get me wrong; practising meditation is an excellent approach to optimizing your health and overall well-being. Meditation is great for relieving and dealing with stress, and all of the issues that come along with it. But I don’t know about you, but I have a very checkered past with meditation. I try to follow some of the guided meditations on the Peloton app; I try to concentrate on my breathing and shut out other thoughts, but boy it’s hard. And if I do manage to relax, I have been known to nod off and fall asleep, which is not the point of meditation even though I enjoy a quick nap as much as the next person and think they’re highly beneficial.

But luckily for us, meditation is not the only way to help us deal with stress.

The whole purpose of meditating is to calm the mind and emotions and relax our physical body too. And there is always more than one way to get there.

Let’s talk about some of the other things to try if meditation is not exactly your thing.

Journaling

I was lucky enough to meet the neuroscientist Dr Tara Swart a few years ago, just after she published her best-selling book ‘The Source’. In it, she describes the myriad benefits from starting a journaling practice and I recommend her book frequently. There’s a link to an article about her work on it here: https://www.penguin.co.uk/articles/2019/01/benefits-of-journaling-5-tips-to-get-started

Spending some time as often as you can writing out your thoughts can definitely help to relieve stress. You can use journaling to list the things you're grateful for, which is known as gratitude journaling. You can use it as a "brain dump" to get all of your thoughts and ideas out of your head to soothe your mind.

If you listen to Tara’s podcast, she also talks about how important it is to revisit your journaling and read what you previously wrote. That gives us the distance to assess how we were feeling at the time and how we deal with stresses. She talks a lot about how we can learn from that and use it to move forward.

Affirmations

These came into my life fairly recently, but they can be really powerful. An affirmation is when you say something to yourself consciously, either silently, or preferably out loud. Some people tap when they do it; I haven’t learned how to do that yet, so I just say a phrase out loud. One that works for me is first thing in the morning, when you put your feet on the floor, saying “Today is going to be a great day” and smiling at the same time. And if you’re pretty sure it’s not going to be a great day, you say “Today is going to be a great day, somehow”. Another one I like is “I am healthy, I am whole”. There are loads of them on social media so find something that resonates with you and try it.

Reading

This is definitely one of my go-to stress relievers. Finding somewhere quiet to completely switch off with a good book has always been an enormous help. I also love just browsing in book shops. For some reason I find them immensely calming. Even just 5 minutes can remind you there is a whole world out there and what is stressing you right now might not be so important once you see your way through it. I also find I get involved more in reading than I do in watching TV.. somehow with TV my mind will still wander - I might even pick up my phone and start scrolling. With reading, especially if you leave your phone in another room, it’s easier to completely switch off and enter another world. And if you’re not keen on reading for whatever reason; don’t forget podcasts. They can be great to help you relax.

Colouring

Adult colouring books have become very popular in the last few years and for good reason. And no, I don’t mean that kind of adult, but colouring pages with lots of detail and tiny areas to colour in. Something that can take you hours. You can always opt for something simple, like kids colouring pages too. The idea is the same. Repeated movements and focusing on the art you’re creating can help to clear your mind.

Knitting or crocheting (or other crafts)

This is definitely on the up. I was sitting in the cafe in the Royal Society of Medicine one afternoon this week and there was a young man having a cup of tea and happily knitting for half an hour before I presume he went back to work. He was clearly enjoying it and also able to hold a conversation with his friend at the same time. But it’s one of those skills where you have to concentrate when you’re doing it - which means your brain can’t interrupt with stress inducing thoughts. Knitting, crocheting or other yarn activities are a great way to de-stress; this is a skill that comes in all levels from beginner to advanced. You can choose a quick little rectangular scarf to make, or a detailed sweater. I have a great friend who started embroidering to help her get over the death of her mother and she now has an amazing set of dining chair seat covers that look incredible. Once you get into the flow of these skills, they're great to do when you're feeling stressed. Not only can they relax your mind to focus on your work, but you can end up delighting yourself or others with the products you create.

Gentle exercise

Gently moving your body is another great way to de-stress. Activities that are slower and less intensive are ideal. Things like walking, yoga, stretching, or tai chi can all be great ways to relax your mind and improve your strength and balance at the same time. This is often really difficult for people to accept. I have had so many menopausal clients who have played sports, run or taken HIIT classes for years but when they reach menopause and cortisol rises, they find it really hard when I tell them that maybe they should drop the high intensity work and take up Pilates. But if they follow my advice, they always come back and tell me how much it helped them physically and mentally. And don’t forget that gardening can also be great exercise!

Sleep in or take a nap

A common cause of increased stress hormones is lack of sleep. Too little sleep and too much stress go hand-in-hand. So, getting enough good quality sleep is important to help you break free from stress without having to meditate. I’ve written before on the importance of a good sleep routine and I’m also a big fan of taking a 10 or 20 minute ‘power nap’ where you concentrate on your breathing (just don’t call it meditation..!)

Pamper yourself

Maybe you love getting massages or mani/pedi's? Maybe you love a long bath or lighting candles? Perhaps you can add your favourite relaxing music to the mix for a pampering evening? Spending some time to pamper yourself regularly is great for your mind, body, and spirit. My European friends will never understand this, but a hot bath can be as beneficial as an expensive massage. Throw in some Epsom salts and lavender oil; keep the dogs and phone out of the bathroom, and just relax.

Spend time in nature

You don’t have to head away for vacation to relax in nature. While a calm beautiful beach or cabin in the woods may be amazing, you don’t have to go that far. Even spending time on the grass at your local park or playground, or walking on a wooded trail in your neighbourhood can do the trick.

Make time for people and pets you love

It's so important to spend time with family, friends, and pets whom you love. New research is coming out about the health issues related to loneliness. Reach out and plan to hang out with your besties, or even offer to take your neighbour's dog for a walk in the park.

Conclusion

Stress reduction is the goal. How you do it, be it meditation or otherwise, is not that important. What’s important is that you find what works for you. This is something I reiterate with all my clients. I ask them to think of a time when they were completely engrossed in what they were doing. It might be music; cinema; even cooking. Whatever it is, start building time in your day or week for regular slots where you do things that help you relax. And make them non-negotiable. This winter, what kept me going through the cold, wet afternoons, was the knowledge that I could set myself up in the evening with a hot bath, a CBD drink, some music, lavender and a good book. Even just 30 minutes will do it.

Try journaling, reading, colouring, knitting/crocheting, gentle exercise, sleep, pampering yourself, spending time in nature, and making time for people and pets you love.

Have other great ideas? Let me know what helps you de-stress!.

Recipe (calming): Lavender Essential Oil

Instructions to inhale directly

Add up to 6 drops of undiluted essential oil to a handkerchief/tissue and inhale occasionally.

Use up to 3 times per day.

Instruction for steam inhalation

Add 3 - 12 drops of undiluted essential oil to a bowl of steaming water. Inhale slowly and deeply

for 5 - 10 minutes. Use up to 3 times per day.

Tip: Lavender isn't the only calming essential oil. You can also use angelica, balsam, benzoin, bitter orange, cedarwood, celery, chamomile, cornmint, cumin, curry, frankincense, grapefruit, jasmine, juniper, labdanum, laurel, lemongrass, marjoram, nutmeg, palmarosa, parsley, patchouli, peppermint, rose, rosewood, sage, sandalwood, scotch pine, spearmint, star anise, sweet basil, sweet orange, thyme, or ylang ylang.

References:

http://www.precisionnutrition.com/getting-control-stress

http://www.healthline.com/nutrition/16-ways-relieve-stress-anxiety

https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/the-power-and-prevalence-of-loneliness-2017011310977

https://nccih.nih.gov/health/stress/relaxation.htm

https://www.dietvsdisease.org/do-essential-oils-work/

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3612440/

http://webprod.hc-sc.gc.ca/nhpid-bdipsn/atReq.do?atid=aromatherap&lang=eng